Me.

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Ontario, Canada
The silence is deadly, head first into assembly, trying to remember the fondest of memories, its killing me to see the worlds hate and dis-pare; no one watching that cares, just a lost soul without any self control. saving the heart for something still unknown, drifting within the cold winters snow. see the world from the view of my very own eyes, saving someone else from there terrible lives, crying in the night, from the pasts slowly dimming light, why stop now and give up the fight of my life, keeping my chin up, at the end of the tunnel is my bright light, the darkness won't consume me, i shine the brightest within the darkened walls; of contempt i shy away from the reality as i build my staircase, hoping Im not missing the top grade nails and essential glue that complete it..my life.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Nobody's Daughter

My eyes are my own, all i have seen, the blackest skies beneath, the never ending star filled nights seem to last forever, in contempt i keep myself, building a shelf that will someday hold my life. 
I have paced these aisles, have counted the miles, but just wanted to be a child. Shoudnt have had to be the mothers mother, playing the father and wishing for an older brother, waiting for hours sometimes days, sitting there i preyed for the day the happiness was here to stay.
She talks to anyone, in her mind one day they would be a friend, doesn't see that they all want out and a quick in. no strings attached she wont be there last, just wanted love, never judges by a jury and giving all these worries that scurry back and forth through the mind, the type, the kind, that make her want to burn the mother fuckers down for stealing her precious time.

You cant make her, break her because shes free, she wont spend another minute on her knees begging for you to forgive her, its time she makes you quiver, make you see how hard it is to live here, in this world as hard as it is just to live.

In a place that never feels like home, nothing owned, just owed and told to go on everyday and pretend everything is ok, learning to let go of the past, that is still behind me and everyday comes back, i was the little girl who held the world in my hands, 
nobody's daughter.




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